why I have not written for so long...

Its been quite some time since i last wrote an original entry. Life has been hectic =p

As most would know by now, I just got engaged on 15th of June :)

So since then we've been trying to settle on a load of stuff... you can't imagine the amount of things that has to be bought, booked, reserved, etc etc... and we are already keeping it really really simple.

The actual wedding day will be in 2009. We won't be doing any pre-wedding photos... so won't have any photos to put up. The only one I have is this (its my engagement ring) I really love the setting :) No claws... simple & classic... Its not huge or gaudy... its perfectly ME ;) Right now we're trying to keep the wedding simple and meaningful. Not a big big bash with half the ppl which we don't even know. Ok, so now that I've gushed over my ring and upcoming wedding, let me get back to why I have not been writing. On top of planning for the wedding, of course the usual busy-ness of life, i.e. work and etc has really taken alot of my time. I haven't even been reading anyone's blog, much less writing mine. However yday a close friend of mine told me about how her colleague suddenly passing away at the very young age of 33. That's like only 4 years older than me. Its scary, freaky and all that. But ultimately it slaps you in the face and kinda wakes you up on what's important in life. You start thinking... tomorrow it could be me. How many of us are able to say with conviction that I've done all that I've dreamed and hope to do and if tomorrow I die I will have no huge regret. I definitely for one can't. There seems to be so many things in life that I have not done or experienced. I remember writing a list of things (in my blog in 06) that I wanted to do before I die and unfortunately most of them I have not started on even though its been abt 2 years now. How much of our lives are taken by the BUSY-ness of the world? And the world is really good with keeping us busy, there are always new movies, new songs, new games, new books, new applications, new gadgets, new tv series, new shopping centres, new restaurants, new brands of shoes, bags, clothes.... so much to do, so little time. And essentially we really have so little time. And how are we spending it? The only way we can experience all the "new" experiences is if we have enough money to buy / spend on them... (And I know it, i mean I'm getting married and flowers alone are freaking expensive!) therefore we work more and more, wanting more and more in terms of money and having less and less time... its a vicious cycle. We want new things, new experiences, but we give up so much of our time trying to earn the ability to experience these new things, yet we end up having no time to enjoy them. Sigh... No wonder there's now even a quarter life crisis, we spend all our time running around in a circle. Of course we don't know what we're doing and wat's the meaning of life! How can there be meaning if all we're doing is running around in circles like a rabid dog. So, what now? For me I've always wanted to draw, paint, write, experience the beauty out there...contemplate... take pictures... be free... bake, cook... laze under the sun... play with puppies :) walk in the rain... And so, here I am back to writing again. Its the one and only thing that I can do right now that won't take too much effort or time away from all the things that I have to do. Damn, I have a teleconference in 15mins... gotta go. The world is once again extending its creepy fingers into my life and trying to choke it. Sigh.

When the lovey dovey feelings fade...

This story tells us something about..... LOVE & LIFE ... a little bit long but be patient ... My husband is an engineer by profession, I love him for his steady nature and..I love the warm feeling when I lean against his broad shoulders. Two years of courtship and now, five years into marriage, I would have to admit, that I am getting tired of it. The reasons of me loving him before, has now transformed into the cause of all my restlessness. I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship and my feelings. I yearn for the romantic moments, like a little girl yearning for candy. My husband is my complete opposite; his lack of sensitivity, and the inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about LOVE. One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce. "Why?" he asked, shocked. "I am tired. There are no reasons for everything in the world!" I answered. He kept silent the whole night, seemingly in deep thought. My feeling of disappointment only increased. Here was a man who was not able to even express his predicament, so what else could I expect from him? And finally he asked me: "What can I do to change your mind?" Somebody said it right... It's hard to change a person's personality,and I guess, I have started losing faith in him. Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered: "Here is the question.... If you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind." Let's say; I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff,and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death. Will you do it for me?" He said: "I will give you your answer tomorrow...." My hopes just sank by listening to his response. I woke up the next morning to find him gone, and saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting underneath a milk glass, on the dining table near the front door, that goes.... My dear, "I would not pick that flower for you, but.... please allow me to explain the reasons further....." This first line was already breaking my heart. I continued reading. "When you use the computer you always mess up the Software programs, and you cry in front of the screen. I have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs.You always leave the house keys behind, thus I have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you. You love travelling but always lose your way in a new city. I have to save my eyes to show you the way. You always have the cramps whenever your "good friend" approaches every month. I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy. You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom. You always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes. I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip your nails and help to remove those annoying white hairs. So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach, as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand...and tell you the colour of flowers, just like the colour of the glow on your young face... Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do... I could not pick that flower yet, and die ... " My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting... and as I continue on reading... "Now, that you have finished reading my answer, and if you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside bringing your favourite bread and fresh milk..." I rushed to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face, clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of bread.... Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does,and I have decided to leave the flower alone... That's LIFE, and LOVE. When one is surrounded by love, the feeling of excitement fades away,and one tends to ignore the true love that lies in between the peace and dullness. Love shows up in all forms; even in very small and cheeky forms. It has never been a model. It could be the dullest and most boring form ... Flowers, and romantic moments are only used and appear on the surface of the relationship. Under all this, the pillar of true love stands... AND THAT'S LIFE The happiest people in the world... are not those who have no problems, but those who learn to live with things that are less than perfect. LOVE is not just between two lovers, husband and wife--it also encompass; mother, father and siblings, sisters and brothers, friends, neighbours and colleagues

Please pass on to those whom you love…